Be happy - a moral obligation

During a conversation with a friend, he said this: it's a moral obligation to be happy. That statement stopped me short. I looked at him with confusion written all over my face. What does he mean by that? Why is it a moral obligation to be happy? We have the right to be happy whenever we want to be. How is it that it's a moral obligation? Since when being happy has become an act of considerations of right and wrong, namely, a moral obligation?

As I thought about it, I came to realise his reason for making this statement. We humans are an emotional bunch of creatures (do excuse my description of us humans if this offends you.. xD). We are easily affected by other people's emotions. Agree? Let me give you an example. When someone around you is feeling down or upset, you tend to be affected by it to some degree. It's true.

So, how does this make being happy is a moral obligation? Well, there are bound to be times when we are upset about something and there are people around us. Don't you think it is a moral obligation to not show your negative emotion just to keep the mood of the people around us up? Wouldn't it be awkward for those people around you if you put on a black face for them?

Think about this: you are in a social gathering. Everyone is happy and having fun. Suddenly, someone walk in with an extremely pissed off face. Can you feel the mood going down already as you are imagining this scenario? Some people might think, gosh, what a party pooper. This is exactly what my friend meant by saying that it's a moral obligation to be happy. That person could have come in to the social gathering with a smile even though he or she is not happy. Just so that the atmosphere of the gathering will continue to remain light and happy.

Whenever I am with a bunch of friends, I really hate to see someone feeling down. It makes me feel uncomfortable and not at peace. I felt so guilty for enjoying myself while that person is feeling down. It doesn't seems right to have fun when someone is feeling down, you get what I mean? Thinking back, I remember the countless times I show my negative emotions (that was when I was younger, okay.. I was young and immature.. xD) when I am around people. I feel so bad about it now because I am making all those people around me feel awful and uncomfortable.

My friend gave a very good example. A husband and wife are in the middle of a huge row. They are screaming at each other, really angry. Suddenly, the doorbell rang. Immediately, they put on a smile and open the door to greet whoever that is at the door. They did that just so that the person will not feel awkward or bad or uncomfortable because they are considerate about other people's welfare.

I totally agree with my friend. How true it is that it is a moral obligation to be happy. We should be more considerate about other people's feelings. One of the bad side of us humans is that we are selfish and self-centred. We can't be bothered about other people's welfare when we are so mad at something or someone. We also want other people's sympathy, so we show our negative emotions. Admit it. That is one of the reasons we show our negative emotions. I know that was one of mine. (yes, I am shameless.. hahahaha..) 

But all this while, it never occur to us that we affected the mood of others when we are so inconsiderate. So, let us stop being inconsiderate and start to put others before us. I find it hard to be happy when I am not. Well, my strategy is that if I really can't pretend to be happy, I would go to a place where I can be alone for a while. Until I am more emotionally stable then only will I rejoin the human society.

There is always time for you to be upset when you are alone. Or with your closest friend or family. But please, do try to be considerate about others and not affect others with your negative energy. It spreads really fast. Trust me when I say this. I know far too well. (yes, yes.. I started it.. =P) Maybe there are people that can ignore it. But not everyone has that ability.

Think about what I wrote. I hope you will come to the same conclusion as I did. It is a moral obligation to be happy. 

The true winner

My church's anniversary is coming up and my pastor's wife asked me to be in charge of the children's presentation (much to my horror.. =O). I wouldn't say I am the best choice but what to do? I just finished my Performing Arts subject last semester. That means I have a teeny, tiny weeny little bit of experience in stage performing that includes acting, singing and dancing. I let them choose what sort of presentation they want to do. The choices are drama, dance or sing (what else? lol...). They chose drama (horror of horrors.. *screams*). So, I started training them.

Last Sunday, I gave them an exercise to give them an idea on what is characterisation. To cut the whole long story short, one of the kids, a girl, gave up and started crying without trying because she thinks it's too hard to do. (I really hate it when kids get whiny. I mean, they chose it. So they should endure it. It's not like I didn't warn them it's gonna be hard and the process won't be as fun as they think it is. *sighs* here we go again....) After dismissing the rest of the class, I sat down beside her and talked to her (with all the patience I have.. *sighs* took a lot to not yell at her and talk to her nicely.. then again, they are just kids.. but then again, cannot pamper them too much.. oh, Lord, give me wisdom!). I needed to tell her a few times to stop crying and talk so that I can understand her and she finally told me why she wanted to quit. Like I said before, she thinks it's too hard. That's when I started to lecture (ahem.. xP) her.

There will be obstacles and problems that will come our way as we continue our journey in life. When things get hard, do we run away and give up? Do we hide ourselves and hope the problem will go away? No. We face it and we go through it. Sure, there will always be failures but that's part of life. We won't become successful without failures. (sounds cliche, I know.. but it's true.. success comes after a fall! =D) Most importantly, we shouldn't give up without trying. How would you know something is so hard if you didn't try to do it?

We shouldn't think that we can't do this or we can't do that. Instead, face everything with a teachable heart. Nothing is easy in this world. But there isn't anything that is too hard either. When things get tough, ask for help. That's when we put down our pride and ego and accept other people's guidance and help. A lot of times, we screw up because we are just too proud to ask for help. (mmmhmmm.. totally understand this,  man.. xD)

Sometimes, after trying, we might find out the problem isn't all that hard at all. That's when a sense of achievement and confidence come in. When our self-confidence is boost up, we will be braver to take up more challenging things, knowing that we can overcome it. See, one good thing leads to another. But before gaining all these good things, we must first be brave enough to take that first step of faith into the unknown. Stepping out of our comfort zone to try out new things or solve problems that we think are hard for us.

So many times I wanted to give up when things get tough and discouraging during my Performing Arts class. Maybe my natural stubborn streak and refusal to be a loser kept me going. I stayed on and preserve. On my final showcase night, I tasted the sweetness of victory and achievement when the audiences clapped and hooted. I found out I had gained a lot of self-confidence in this class and being able to do things that I would never do in my life. I gathered my courage and took that first step of faith into the unknown and I am glad I preserved. I can happily tell you that I have grown and learnt so much in that class.

It's okay to grumble and complain a bit throughout the whole process. It's alright to cry once in a while when things get really tough. Remember to stand up again when we fall down. That's one of the key to success. If (dang, what's his name again.. gah.. I need to go Google it out.. ><) Thomas Edison gave up after failing for the 3rd or 4th time, do you think we would have light bulbs to use today? Keep on trying until we succeed.

The true winner isn't the person that have a natural talent in something and won some competition. 
The true winner is the person that try, never gave up and preserve until the end. 

Agree? =) Anyways, after spending some time yapping at the girl, she finally agreed to try again the following week. That's my girl. =)

Sometimes, we just need to have a little faith, bring out some confidence and courage and just do it (wow, Nike commercial.. xD). Don't give up without trying. That would make you the ultimate loser. At least try first. If you really can't and give up, at least you can say that you have tried.

Don't give up! Have faith! Be courageous and confident! =D

YOU ARE THE WINNER!!!